look what you've done to me

Work's busy, life's fun, blogging has been set aside and I am almost done with exchange goodies online. Please pardon my tardiness Caryn :)

I don't normally abide the rules around me but just for the record if you wanna be my friend,

1. Let's not play "hi i'm your boss and you are just an ordinary I.T. girl so let's be professional at work." all the time.
2. Stop annoying me.

You know who you are pumpkin, let's not talk anymore.

As for the entire webhosting team moving to another center I'd say spare me the loneliness. I already missed them a lot and no more Makati chiggy's to witness our grudges and after shift drinking session.

Creative Swap

I am joining Caryn's creative swap for May/June. I am excited because one, this is my first time and 2 I have the chance to exchange creative goodies (as the project suggests^.^)





So here's a meme I have to post as guide my creative swap partner:





1. What kind of creative things are you into?
-I create bags, pouches, postcards. I love to stitch..stitch..stitch..and stitch.. =)





2. How would you describe your personal style? (girly, ethnic, modern, etc.)
- I am more of a modern type person not so much into kikay/girly stuff.





3. What are your favorite colors?
- I love green, it's my favorite color. I also like shades of brown, gray and black. I like earth colors. Not so much with blue or orange or pink. =)





4. What is one craft you would like to learn?
- I wanna learn how to sew a "real dress".





5. What other hobbies are you into?
-I am a wanderlust, i love to travel but when i'm at home i am learning new language (which I think would help me in my future travel). I also love to read anything. I get inspiration from various artist online or from my favorite magazine "ISH". I create websites, i love incorporating art with technology so I am more into designing webpages.





6. What items do you really wish you had right now?
-i wish i have a roundtrip ticket to Japan or vietnam... nah just kidding.. I wanna have a cute doll (made by my partner) or a stylish journal or notebook.

Davao is just perfect!

I don't write too much these days but I spend most of the time trying to figure out to finish my online store. It's been dead for months now. I feel so drain when I go home and I'd rather hug my pillows, sleep and dream for 8 hours to prepare myself to work. I don't do too much talking these days. As far as work is concern I am doing great. I am moving to I.T. and I've been waiting for it for three years. I didn't know moving is almost like breaking up after staying in the account for 4 years. I have been reading blogs and before I go to sleep I read a few chapters of my PAULA (I've been reading this for week) I can't even make halfway to it. I think it's a sad book. Carmen's leaving too, and that's sad. I have been drinking too much coke for the past days, I am not a fan. I haven't been drinking coke for months, I think it's a manifestation that I am sad, sad for a lot of reasons. I would want to travel abroad again, alone. I want to go to Bangkok alone and stay there for week. I love to walk and roam around Kangkok wearing short pants, shirt and flip flops. It feels so good busying myself in the sea of strangers even better staying in a low cost hotel with nothing much to do but sleep in an airconditioned room. I love Bangkok even though I can't understand their language, but I am learning that soon. I love sipping real red tea for 15baht, I love Tom Yam Bass, I simply adore Thailand. I can sense another trip to BKK in the Middle of this year, you betcha, I can do it alone again. =)

But I'm gonna tell you a fullfilling story. My Davao trip last week (Marc 1-3, 2009) with 7 of my friends from manila (6 first timers to set foot on Davao and Mindanao, 2 just had their first plane jitters and no one speaks bisaya but Heath and I). I told them that if it's gonna cost me 3K or more then I'll stay at my parents house and sleep there for 12 hours. Luckily it was a tight budget getaway. Our first day was a trip to Eden Nature Park. First night was spent at my parents house with Edel and Bulet, the rest stayed at Roadway Inn. Then an overnight stay at Blue Jazz, Samal Island. 1st dinner was at Jack's Ridge and I was glad he came. Like I couldn't deny the happiness I felt. I thought I had to beg but he made an effort I think the whole point of my visit was to see him. hehe. I saw mother, papa and I was so glad to see jini. We had a couple of hours talking about whatever things and I saw Achi on my first day there. Just the people I needed to see. We slept in a tent during our overnight stay at Samal it was really cool. When we woke up the next morning the water was so peaceful, I feel like swimming but I didn't. The combination of sun and the salty water isn't so good for me (even with sun block applied all over my body). But even so the day was great. The most wonderful part of my visit was that my mom didn't hate me. We parted with good hearts and I had to leave Davao with content. I soooo love it!

That's about it for my trips.

America's Next Top Model Cycle 12 has begun so I can tell I'm gonna have sleepless nights again! haha

weird things come to life

Yosi Break

While we were sharing our funny stories to our program director Car, Cash and Toni lit a couple of yosi then someone not far from where we're standing called my name. I was trying so hard to remember her face and I was staring long enough to remember her, thank you very much, my memory served me right. She was one of the webhosting peeps now wandering the streets of Ayala having her yosi break too. How are you doing Chimes? =)

GM diet

I think I have tried almost every diet possible to avoid getting super duper fat. I know I gain weight too fast and loose it too slow. So starting tomorrow Edel and I are to start a new diet called General Motors diet. No, eating motorcycle batteries and drinking gasoline is not part of it. You can read it HERE. So what I did I print a copy of the program then I posted it on our fridge for my daily reminder because you have to eat different types of food (including tomatoes - no opt out- hahaha). Looking at the list, it's a challenge but I think I can do it- it doesn't require me to eat meat so I am OK with it. To start the program right - you will expect to loose 7-10 pounds after 7 days- Bulet, Jennybabe and myself went to Mercury drug to check my weight. All we needed was 5 pesos then the machine printed the results after all the humiliation from an uber loud "please stand straight and avoid talking". Kulang na lang talaga sabihin nya "kung hindi sasabihin kong malakas tong weight mo". The result?

Weight: 132 lb./60kg
Height: 5'3

Blood pressure:
Maximum systolic . . 119 mmHG
Minumum diastolic .. 65 mmHG
Pulse/minute .. 81

Body Fat Estimation:
Fat Index ... 32.3%
Fat Mass ... 421lbs 8oz/19.3kg
Free F. Mass .. 89lb 10 oz/40.7kg
Age ... 32 (preferred age)

References

Your normal weight is between 50.6 kg to 62.9 kg / 111 lb 7 oz - 138 lb 8 oz
Your current Body Mass Index is 23.7 kg/m (squared). The Normal BMI value is between 20-24.9

World Health Organisation Blood pressure values is mmHg:
Normal, up to 140 (max) ... 90 (minimum)
High, between 141-159 (max) ... 91-94 (minimum)
hypertensio + 160 (max) ... + 95 (minimum)

Normal Fat Index .... 17-24%
Normal Fat Mass ... 8.3 - 12.9 kg or 181 lb 4 oz - 281 lb 6 oz

This shows my fat is extremely not important in my body. hahaha. I'm all set for tomorrow and I'll let you know the progress after a week.


Uy-uy-uy-uy

After the mercury drug incident we were laughing our asses off as we head to the jeepney station somewhere in Ayala. I told Bulet and Jen about my crazy iet then a couple of minutes after Bulet startled us with "UY" then the guy in return said "UY" then Jen said "UY" he replied with an "UY" then I suddenly realize he's a person I know too so I said "UY" then I realize again he is the person I don't exactly wanna see to complete my say so I said "UY" and out of nowhere we were exchanging hi fives and we were laughing as hard as we can then I resume the talking. Then Jen said "awkward" then I said "that felt really weird" and we laugh until we parted ways. It was really weird when planned things do not necessarily come out on very unexpected meetings like that. I thought I'd feel indifferent and I thought I'd react differently, really I felt fine and funny all at the same time. Just because my plan didn't work out doesn't mean I am not OK, suprisingly I feel great..and yeah funny. Nice meeting you again Tristan.

Never Psuedo

Warning: This is intended for someone and if you feel like love stories are darn crazy and cheesy posts don't deserve a space on the cyberspace then leave this blog right this moment =)

This probably is the longest love letter that I am going to write in a lifetime to someone very special to me, to someone who has been my deepest secret, to someone I laugh with, hate with, get angry with, pray with, most of all love with. Someone I care for the longest time, someone I miss, someone I really would like to spend my whole life with and someone I would love to see wrinkled and hair grayed, someone really special. I did write a couple of psuedo love letters back in college because that I think was the most effective way of saying things of letting him hear what I need to speak or getting noticed. I believe him in many ways in fact I adore him most of the time and just by looking at him I feel so high, he is my inspiration, he just makes me smile. Everyday I appear as his little tomboy best buddy but all along I feel different because of course I know that liking someone close to you and has been the ex-boyfriend of your closest girl friend is bad. Do not get me wrong because these things didn't stop me from liking him, I guess that was when I think I really fell in love with him. He is just beautifully presented to me and everyday with him is as perfect as getting high marks in grade school. Oh yes, my love story is as ordinary as everyone else, I can summarize it in two this phrase:

"There was girl who fell in love with his boy bestfriend who kept her feelings secret because she's so afraid of many things and then one day he knew about it and she doesn't know what to do."

So kill me now?

But I would love to reiterate my ordinary story for him. It is no secret any longer, someone burst my bubbles just like that! Did it scare me? oh yes! it shattered the hell out of me and the hell would I tell him the truth (you are just right here at the beginning). Funny that this has to happen because believe me I have moved on but moving on doesn't mean I forget every heartbeat. You are my 10 thousand heartbeats and I mean it. Has there been an awful-lot of moments I wish I didn't feel it because I might not dare look at him when he knows the secret but that was then and I am old enough to understand.

Now I wish to see you sleep so I could dust magical spells on you, that's how much I wish you'd me mine.

He knows me too well that he has to say the right words before he says things or else we would end up arguing and I always win. Or he could be as straight forward as "have u ever realized nga for some time in your life imo lng gna daya imong sarili" oh great! Did I? He hit me right in the head and those were just the right words. I understood him right away, that I complicate things and he sees right through me how I actually feel but I keep things in secret and I am sorry. I told you relationship wasn't presented to me in a good way and no one told me that two people can actually live happily ever after. God it really pains me, had I known, had I gathered that much courage, had I composed the right words you could have heard it way way way way before last saturday. Are you serious all along? I swear it was a yes had you asked or was I stupid not to deliver my piece? I was scared.

You are my best man, my bestfriend, you are just best for me. You are someone I look forward to in going to class, in staying late in school and in going home because that's when I really feel close to you. Those were my happiest even more than that best. I got the hang of everything we do, it was all so normally to me. I fight every way I can to avoid confrontation because I might lost for words. It was easy for me to pretend I don't like you, what I feel was supposed to be a secret. I thought my love was a one way street, now I thought wrong. Had youtold me, had I known..

My comfort.

All along I thought no one can part us because I strongly believe no matter what happens we will have each other, we will keep each other safe, we will have each other in our hearts no matter how far we are. I still believe in that. So when I think you are in need I know I can extend a few of my fingers, I always want to be part of you in every way. So damn hard! I want to know your whereabouts, how have you been, how well are you doing, how are you all along? Is someone taking care of you? I want you to be safe all the time. I hate it when I can't share every happiness you have or cry every heartache you encounter. I can put you on a pedestal, that's how grand my feeling is, I chose you to sit somewhere in my heart so no one can touch you there, where you are always safe.

But you are more than these words Mel and you know that. You are more than loved and more than missed and I can't tell how you turned my world 360 degress when you told me I was that special to you too . It took me a decade (literally) to get this much courage and it shakes the hell out of my darn bones to get as close as saying "can you be mine forever? or can I be part of you family?" I don't exactly know what happen and how all these happen but I know one fact that my heart belongs to you. Someone told me to write from the heart and that I am a coward not to tell you how I feel. So I am writing from the heart. Honesty, you said, shall free me and I'm glad you reminded me. Just like you re-read my phony letters, re-read this as much as you can so you know how each day you make me smile, so you know each day I wish you're here right beside me and each time you read this reminds you how lucky you are that I love you this much. An not a single word is phony in this letter, everything is as much as I could squeeze from my heart, I came out of my stupid shell to say right to your face that I am always here for you and I really really really really miss you, just so you know. And can we talk more often, it sure feels like christmas.

consider this

Not an animal lover but I don't hate them either but I consider this.




On a considerably out-of-my-hand decision, let's talk about justice. in lay man's term please because I don't get to understand a single word as vague as that. No i'm not talking about the video above i'm referring to something else. It makes me really uncomfortable so to speak, effing judgement.


Might as well consider this, more love in 2009

"Es tan corto el amor, y es tan largo el olvido."
"Loving is so short, forgetting is so long"
-Pablo Neruda, Poem XX



Right you are. I miss my language classes.

Maybe this too.

Desiderata



I am optimistic that 2009 is a good year. No matter how much you feel that 2008 ends with nothing but heartaches, pains, grudges or even sorrow consider another year. Open your mind and challenge yourself with bigger responsibilities. Smile, maybe you forgot to wear that this year, laugh and pray.

Finally consider a travel abroad or back home. As for me I've already considered this I have even booked a flight in Feb and a couple of days back home in March (lucky us we booked a 456.00 pesos round trip ticket to Davao).

HAPPY 2009 EVERYONE!!

Work hard, party harder!

I know I worked so hard this year (well not so damn hard that I won't consider my rest days) that working hard means giving yourself a break to party and end the year right!

INTENSITY
The Aegis + PeopleSupport year end party
Manila + 12.07.08
The Fort, Open Field
Taguig City

This made me laugh. While I was having a dose of some famous sites I came across this..

an ad from Yahoo!. =)

HAPPY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!